Let it be forgotten, as a flower is forgotten,
Forgotten as a fire that once was singing gold.
Let it be forgotten forever and ever,
Time is a kind friend, he will make us old.
If anyone asks, say it was forgotten
Long and long ago,
As a flower, as a fire, as a hushed footfall
In a long-forgotten snow.

I am not yours, not lost in you,
Not lost, although I long to be
Lost as a candle lit at noon,
Lost as a snowflake in the sea.
You love me, and I find you still
A spirit beautiful and bright,
Yet I am I, who long to be
Lost as a light is lost in light.
Oh plunge me deep in love - put out
My senses, leave me deaf and blind,
Swept by the tempest of your love,
A taper in a rushing wind.

~Sarah Teasdale

Good Stuff

This really spoke to me tonight...so, yay!

Christian Perfection
Not that I have already attained, or am already perfect . . . —Philippians 3:12

It is a trap to presume that God wants to make us perfect specimens of what He can do— God’s purpose is to make us one with Himself. The emphasis of holiness movements tends to be that God is producing specimens of holiness to put in His museum. If you accept this concept of personal holiness, your life’s determined purpose will not be for God, but for what you call the evidence of God in your life. How can we say, "It could never be God’s will for me to be sick"? If it was God’s will to bruise His own Son ( Isaiah 53:10 ), why shouldn’t He bruise you? What shines forth and reveals God in your life is not your relative consistency to an idea of what a saint should be, but your genuine, living relationship with Jesus Christ, and your unrestrained devotion to Him whether you are well or sick.
Christian perfection is not, and never can be, human perfection. Christian perfection is the perfection of a relationship with God that shows itself to be true even amid the seemingly unimportant aspects of human life. When you obey the call of Jesus Christ, the first thing that hits you is the pointlessness of the things you have to do. The next thought that strikes you is that other people seem to be living perfectly consistent lives. Such lives may leave you with the idea that God is unnecessary— that through your own human effort and devotion you can attain God’s standard for your life. In a fallen world this can never be done. I am called to live in such a perfect relationship with God that my life produces a yearning for God in the lives of others, not admiration for myself. Thoughts about myself hinder my usefulness to God. God’s purpose is not to perfect me to make me a trophy in His showcase; He is getting me to the place where He can use me. Let Him do what He wants.-- My Utmost for His Highest

"Yet faith is called upon, and that right often, to wait in patience before God and is prepared for God's seeming delays in answering prayer. Faith does not grow disheartened because prayer is not immediately honored; it takes God at His Word and lets Him take what time he chooses in fulfilling his purposes and in carrying on his work. There is bound to be much delay and long days of waiting for true faith, but faith accepts the conditions--knows there will be delays in answering prayer and regards such delays as times of testing, in the which, it is privileged to show its mettle and the stern stuff of which it is made. " ~E.M. Bounds

a picture....

So, to be honest, this weekend hasn't been the greatest. Maybe I'm just being an emotional girl, but it's definitely been filled with lots of ups and downs. Today wasn't much different. A while ago I felt like I was allowing myself to be distracted from God in all the little stupid annoying daily chores/thoughts/worries/responsibilities etc. Now, I feel that I'm instead falling into all the emotions of things and not running to my Lord and His beautiful truths. I was taken aback a little today while I was working with my little kids in the afternoon. One little boy in particular has so much energy and vibrancy that he's up one minute, and the second something goes wrong, he has a huge crying fit about it. Everytime something that he thought was his was taken away from him (like this darn small plastic ball he became obsessed with and called "MINE" with such a tone of self-consumed ownership it was ridiculous), he immediately dropped everything and started crying and could not be consoled in the least. He was so focused on this one thing that he wanted so badly-this one thing that was taken away-that he became so distraught all he could do was stand there and cry. It was like he was paralyzed by this. Now, granted, he is just a young child--this is what they do. They cry and throw fits if they don't get their way. But sometimes, it's interesting to look at this picture and in some form, compare it to what we do.
Later in the day, this small boy was just so upset by everything, that all he could do was frantically try to crawl into my lap and bury his face in my arms. Now, I only see this boy for a few hours, but still he recognizes that older figure--that comfort that can be found in some 'adult'--and turn to it when they're upset. How much more does our Father in heaven want us to turn to Him when we feel like the world is ending, that no one understands, that we just keep screwing things up and don't know how to move on.....Especially after this past weekend that I had, all I could envision was me wanting to run up and jump into my Father's arms and burrow my face in His warmth and love. I forget so often that we have a Lord who would rather die for us than live without us...that in spite of our sin, He still loves us....that even when we screw up, or don't understand why we must wait for things, or especially when we're so darn selfish that we throw a fit when we don't get what we think we deserve.....He still loves us. That's pretty extraordinary. Unimaginable. Beautiful.

What an amazing God we serve. How amazing His grace and love.

"He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart......" Isaiah 40:11

pretty.

haha, just read the spanish name of this plant. That's just great fun, right there.

some goodies...

"With thee conversing, I forget all time,

All seasons, and their change; all please alike.

Sweet is the breath of morn, her rising sweet,

With charm of earliest birds, pleasant the sun,

When first on this delightful land he spreads

His orient beams, on herb, tree, fruit and flower

Glistering with dew; fragrant the fertile earth

After soft showers, and sweet the coming-on

Of grateful evening mild; then silent night,

With this her solemn bird, and this fair moon,

And these the gems of Heaven, her starry train:

But neither breath of morn, when she ascends

With charm of earliest birds; nor rising sun

On this delightful land; nor herb, fruit, flower

Glistering with dew; nor fragrance after showers;

Nor grateful evening mild; nor silent night,

With this her solemn bird; nor walk by moon,

Or glittering star-light, without thee is sweet.

~John Milton, Paradise Lost

I am not yours, not lost in you,

Not lost, although I long to be

Lost as a candle lit at noon,

Lost as a snowflake in the sea.

You love me, and I find you still

A spirit beautiful and bright,

Yet I am I, who long to be

Lost as a light is lost in light.

Oh plunge me deep in love - put out

My senses, leave me deaf and blind,

Swept by the tempest of your love,

A taper in a rushing wind

~Sarah Teasdale

"...I realized that the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: They will be done." Elizabeth Elliot

Coffee pots, rain spots, and bird songs....

"Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor do they reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?" Matt. 6

What a wonderful image. Last Friday morning, I woke up early and walked out to our front porch. Much to my surprise, it was actually raining. A large smile appeared on my face almost involuntarily as I was overwhelmed with happiness. I ran off to the kitchen to make myself some coffee and quickly returned to my spot by the window looking out. I had a rough night of tossing and turning (one that I'm usually not accoustomed to, since I can sleep nearly anywhere in anyposition and for however long and never wake up for anything other than my annoying, interruptive alarm). I was rather cranky, but once I looked outside, things changed. My eyes wandered upwards to our string of lights we have running the length of our patio overhang. Right there on the corner, balancing on the delicate line, was a large beautiful red-breasted bird. (I can't tell you what it was since I didn't inherit my mom's love for and impressive knowledge of the endless bird varieties, sorry mom). He had just landed on the line and began singing his song with this beautifully pleasant sound...rather ethereal....very calming. I stared at him for not even 5 seconds when all of a sudden this passage from Matthew sprang into my head. "Do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink...but seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you." It took me back for a brief instant to my freshman year Biblestudy where I was going through a painful time of doubt and confusion, and we happened to have a study on this very passage. Since then, the image of the little birds fluttering in and out of my days, a creation by the Creator, fully taken care of...it always comes into my mind.
I began a new small goal as far as my reading goes. I want to read through 1 Gospel a week, then rinse and repeat. (haha sorry, soap commercial tag lines just came floating through my too-easily-distracted head). Last week, I was on Matthew...and conveniently enough, came to this passage the day before the bird incident. What a coincidence, God! So back to the bird, he proceeded to sit on that string of lights for a good few moments, singing his heart out to the gentle patter of rain falling on that early morning. I couldn't help but begin to mull over my life and how incredibly blessed I am. And with that, how utterly selfish I am. I neglect to reflect on all that God's blessed me with--my wonderful health, a close and nurturing family, the ability to be in college, a car that works, computers, books, a shelf full of food, a warm bed to lay my head, utterly the mercy and forgiveness He's given me...and the list is endless. I have been soooo blessed by God that all my needs have been provided for and more so. I take that for granted so much in my life. Especially since materialism and greed runs rampant here in the States, it's easy to think of all the 'things' I don't have and neglect to focus on all the things (tangible and intangible) that I do have, even such basic knowledge about clean water, brushing my teeth, access to fresh foods galor, that so many around the world have no clue or no access to.
Basically, I could go on a whole tirade about all these things, but you get the point. The main small lesson I learned was a humbling one. All thanks to that little singing bird just doing his job--glorifying his Creator--and to the Holy Spirit who opened my eyes to this little devotional moment. To just stop and reflect on how much God has taken care of me, has blessed me, and who still loves me in spite of my horrific selfishness and pride. I can get so caught up in the small little worries about life-all the "ME" times that I have faaar too frequently, about how I don't know what I'm doing after I graduate, about how I'm so anxious about so many things, so many questions, so many stupid emotions. "Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight. Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain. Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word." Ps 119:35-37. Although it can be utterly painful, it is so valuable to pray for God to make you humble. To strip you of your pride, so that you can come to him and acknowledge how badly we all need a savior and how powerless I am to do any good or have any change without Him. May I continually seek Him, may I turn away from the traps of this world, the traps of my own sin, and see how great God is.
Thank you, little chirpy birds, delightfully raining mornings, and a coffee pot that takes forever so that I had a chance to learn this small little lesson before it was ready and I began my day. ;)

May this be me....

"Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?" ~Matthew 16:24-26


My Father's way may twist and turn,
My heart may throb and ache,
But in my soul I'm glad I know,
He maketh no mistake.

My cherished plans may go astray,
My hopes may fade away,
But still I'll trust my Lord to lead
For He doth know the way.

Though night be dark and it may seem,
The day will never break;
I'll pin my faith, my all in Him,
He maketh no mistake.

There's so much now I cannot see,
My eyesight's far too dim;
But come what may, I'll simply trust
And leave it all to Him.

For by and by the mist will lift
And plain it all He'll make,
Through all the way, though dark to me,
He maketh no mistake.
~A.M. Overton

I love my girls.....

Girls' night with the hotties.....







...more to come soon

Good stuff...

So, I'm havin a 'blah' day, and I read this. Thank you, Lord....I needed it.

These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full —John 15:11

What was the joy that Jesus had? Joy should not be confused with happiness. In fact, it is an insult to Jesus Christ to use the word happiness in connection with Him. The joy of Jesus was His absolute self-surrender and self-sacrifice to His Father— the joy of doing that which the Father sent Him to do— ". . . who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross . . ." ( Hebrews 12:2 ). "I delight to do Your will, O my God . . ." ( Psalm 40:8 ). Jesus prayed that our joy might continue fulfilling itself until it becomes the same joy as His. Have I allowed Jesus Christ to introduce His joy to me?
Living a full and overflowing life does not rest in bodily health, in circumstances, nor even in seeing God’s work succeed, but in the perfect understanding of God, and in the same fellowship and oneness with Him that Jesus Himself enjoyed. But the first thing that will hinder this joy is the subtle irritability caused by giving too much thought to our circumstances. Jesus said, ". . . the cares of this world, . . . choke the word, and it becomes unfruitful" ( Mark 4:19 ). And before we even realize what has happened, we are caught up in our cares. All that God has done for us is merely the threshold— He wants us to come to the place where we will be His witnesses and proclaim who Jesus is.
Have the right relationship with God, finding your joy there, and out of you "will flow rivers of living water" ( John 7:38 ). Be a fountain through which Jesus can pour His "living water." Stop being hypocritical and proud, aware only of yourself, and live "your life . . . hidden with Christ in God" (Colossians 3:3 ). A person who has the right relationship with God lives a life as natural as breathing wherever he goes. The lives that have been the greatest blessing to you are the lives of those people who themselves were unaware of having been a blessing.
~Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest

I will wait for You there
Down on my knees where I met
You Give You all of my cares
Find a grace to hold onto now

I’m calling for You
I will wait for You there
far from the world and it’s violence
It left broken and bare
I need to hear You in the silence now
I’m calling for You

And with outstretched arms
I will sing out melodies
And my beating heart
Will pour out a symphony


Hallelujah’s in the morning
Hallelujah’s in the night
I will wait for you as long as I have life
I will wait for You there
Down On my knees where I met you
Cause life is a war fought with tears
But You are the strength I hold onto now
I’m calling for you

God is good. :)

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree.

A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast.

A tree that looks at God all day
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

A tree that may in summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
~Joyce Kilmer

Nightly ramblings....

Sometimes, I feel like I'm a little kid all over again....like I've turned back into my little self who 15 years ago would incessantly ask questions. I wanted to know everything (or maybe I just wanted to hear myself talk). I would turn to the great authority of my parents and ask them every question in the book-mostly on the basic level of why this or how that or what happens when you squirt ants with soapy water (which I did of course, I was a bug exterminator at a young age).....recently though, I feel I've returned to my endless questioning phase. I just want to know why everything happens the way it does....why people come in and out of my life, why I've ended back up in phoenix for the summer, how come I still don't know 100 percent what I'm doing with my major...and so on and so forth. It's easy to become frantic over not having answers to what seems like anything, which is why I can only turn to the great authority I know. My Lord. He knows why, He knows how, He knows what for.....He knows it all. It's up to Him, however, if He's going to fill me in on it...after all, who am I to frantically feel that I deserve the right to know why I'm going through the things I am as if I'm completely innocent of it all and it's owed to me to know. In God's incredible (and unfathomable, however you spell that) mercy and grace, He understands my want to know, my secret desire to have that ultimate security that everything's going to be ok so I don't have to worry about anything. And you know what....I've got that, in Him. Even if I don't know in this life, I do know that inevitably comes down to God's character...He is love...and even when I'm struggling throuh so much, I know that His love covers all, that He will give me peace, He will grow me, He will comfort me, He will reveal to me His purposes and more of His character as long as I keep seeking after Him....and there it is....seeking after Him and not desperately seeking after an answer just to make me feel 'better' or more at 'ease' with the way things are. I haven't been doing a good job of that and so that is my prayer. Just as Paul said, He learned the secret to being content in every circumstance....in the end, am I more concerned with wanting to know why God works in the way He does, or is it to simply know Him? To take joy in my salvation through Him and share the fullness of His grace with those lost in this world.
Ok, I'm done now. I'm not sure if any of that made any sense, but you know, I'm not concerned if my thoughts do or not. I simply want to forget what's gone behind, and press on toward the future and what God's calling me to right now, even if I don't understand the reasons behind it. I seek to be obedient to Him adn simply trust....easier said than done, but hey, I can do all things through Him who gives me strength. :) praise the Lord

You could be happy and I won't know
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go
And all the things that I wished I had not said Are played on lips 'till it's madness in my head
Is it too late to remind you how we were
But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur Most of what I remember makes me sure
I should have stopped you from walking out the door
You could be happy, I hope you are
You made me happier than I'd been by far Somehow everything I own smells of you
And for the tiniest moment it's all not true
Do the things that you always wanted to
Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do
More than anything I want to see you go
Take a glorious bite out of the whole world
~Snow Patrol

Road Trips...

So, I went on a road trip this last weekend. It was definitely a grand experience, especially since it was a father/daughter road trip. My mom ended up getting sick at the last minute, so I ended up being 'mom' for a few days and driving my dad to Vegas for his continuing education classes. We left about 5:30 on Wednesday evening after a long day of work and drove off into the sunset--literally. After getting out of the ridiculous bumper to bumper traffic on the Az freeways, we were all of a sudden one little lone car driving through the barren desert as the sun was setting directly in front of us. Under normal circumstances, I would have gauffed at how dry and brown everything was and how I can't believe we live in a place that is so 'ugly.' (which would have gotten me a quick reprimand from my desert-loving mother who always sticks up for our good 'ole Az, thx mom). But this time, however, I had a different outlook on it. After spending two weeks plodding around the endlessly green countryside of the UK, I began to see our desert in a new light. Sure, I have an obsession with green vegetation and will be the first to jump and gawk at how amazing it all is when I see it (as most of you know). But, I still do love the desert at heart. It is purely for a lack of seeing such thriving green surroundings that drives my love for the verdant green parks and mountainsides...and such novelties do bring me joy. However, there truly is nothing like a vast spanse of desert lands that are spotted by majestic saguaro cacti--especially when the sun is setting behind an outcropping of rocky mountains. It harkens back to the times of the 'wild west' when settlers were flocking to the open free spaces of this land. How they must have seen our deserts, as they were traveling on horseback through the very regions we were driving through that night. I always think back to the wild history of the west when I'm on the road--and that was enough to satisfy my eye. As much as I complain about how hot or how ugly some of our state is, I earnestly have a great appreciation for it and really can't imagine not having grown up here and being blessed to see the sights I've seen off the beaten track. Anyways, it was a great drive up to 'ole Vegas.
While my dad was locked away in endless meetings, I decided to explore the glories that are the "strip." And again, as much as I pass judgment on the evils that exist in Vegas, I decided to set aside my self-righteous judgments and wander the streets that I have always declared to detest so much. With our hotel being at the way freakin' end of the strip, I put on my wrong walking shoes (figures) and walked the 25min walk to the other end and back, not to mention in the 110 degree heat. When I returned to Mandalay Bay, I paid to see the acquarium which turned out to be one of the best things there.....I made the official decision that if reincarnation did exist, I would choose to come back as a Stingray. There's just something about that animal that gets me. I do enjoy looking at sea life, but I have never really had this great passion for or draw to the ocean. But, the stingray, wow. It's like it just glides through the water without a care in the world. Maybe it's the way that it moves-the grace and fluidity-that stikes me. Probably because I feel so often that I am the complete opposite in my own movements. (aka, Costa Rica crutches and the numerous other injuries I've incurred due to my lack of coordination). anyway, I just think they look like amazing creatures and God sure had quite the creative touch when He made those, along with the other great sea creatures.

After my outing and the miles that I seemed to have walked, I returned to the hotel to peel off my stupid gladiator-esque sandals that pretty much cut huge slits into my feet. I have two feet of blisters to show for my efforts that day. Note to self *when going walking for an unknown distance, make sure to wear comfortable shoes. The rest of the night was great--hob-nobbing with all the eye people at the vision trade show thingy. The one good thing about it was that dad paid for us to have the 'wine tasting' that one of the companies was hosting. Which meant, 4 different tables full of wine and cheese samplings. yum.
So yeah, that's pretty much the trip. For those of you wondering, I did go gamble for a few hours that night. In fact, my dad and I stayed out till past 3am that night (shocking) hittin' up the 5 cent poker machines. It was great fun, but unfortunately, neither of us won much. In fact, I lost 3 bucks off it. Oh well. I guess next time I need to go for the higher risk factor ones and try for the 25cent ones. Look at me--I'm such a risk taker ;)
After the quick turn--around business trip with dad, this is what I got from it: deserts are fun, walking during the middle of the day in them are not, comfortable shoes are a must, stingrays are freakin' the bomb, they should invent dessert-only buffets and I'd be one of their biggest customers, gamblings pretty much a waste of time especially if you're a non-risk taker like me, or pretty much just have no money to burn, I'm glad I'm not a doctor and don't have to sit through 4 straight hours of 'classes,' wait, I'm still in 'classes' crap!, and lastly....there's pretty much no place like home (although seeing other places is a very close second in my book). OH, and more lastly (yeah i know my english is terrible) my dad's pretty much amazing :)

Home....

Cambridge. However, makes me feel as if I were in Italy. Still one of my favs.
Old church. York.

Another one of my dreams-crew boat on a river





And for all of you who missed it, there's another 'Jenny face' for ya. This time, in Glen Coe, Scotland
Cold. It was cold. And wet too. Darn loch ness.
Need I say more. Simply, wonderful. I could pitch a tent and live right there.

Just can't help myself. Amazing park in Wales.
Haha. "Whilst". love it!








(For Erin,) the closest thing to a chickmunk and the crazy park lady feeding them. that'll be me one day
Uh, creepy street in Cambridge. I don't know what's scarier, Tucson ghetto alleyways, or this.
Gina was abducted on a footbridge in London. haha, I'm pretty sure she was.
So there's for my only 'artistic' shot. (hence, no artistic bone in my body, but i try). I thought it was kinda cool.
Ok, so I never quite found my Scotshunk, but he was close enough. and in kilt, nonetheless.
Another great park. Edinburgh.
I tell you, unless I'm crazy, that looks like the British Isles in the clouds. go figure.






the phrase of the trip, "mind the ___".

Apparently, I have my own pub. Sweet!

The most (here it comes) quintessential old Scotsman, waiting at the train station. Precious!




A touching statue in the Glasgow bus stop. I liked it.










Pretty much the greatest park ever (hyde is in a category by itself, for nostalgic reasons) Park in Dublin






Ok, don't really understand what this means, but a ton of kegs running on a track at the Guinness brewery--it just looked like fun.
Haha, I had this great urge to steal this sign and put it up in my room. it just screams Jenny. ;)
Bath











Finally back from all my wanderings.....it feels like a dream from far ago that I actually went. What's better than becoming a vagabond for two weeks and getting lost in the land of architecturally brilliant cities embedded with wonderfully green parks. such a different world.
So, in light of my taking too many pictures (as everyone knows), I wanted to include a few of my favs. And just an underlying note, the pictures don't do the places justice. They're all just places that you have to see with your own two eyes and not a camera lens. So all of you, go!!

"The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page." -- St. Augustine

I'm off....

Well.....i'm off to the UK. wish me well, all!

"...I realized that the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have our way in the end, but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: They will be done." Elizabeth Elliot a wise lady, a hard thing to learn.

a story....

So funny story from this weekend...let's see if I can do it justice by retelling it

My dad had continuing education classes on Sunday up in Oro Valley at El Conquistador resort-translation, about as far north as Salt Lake city. Ok, not that far, it just felt like forever when you're racing to meet them out there and not miss the end of that smashing Suns game where we kicked complete hiney. So yeah, I slightly sped a little, ok maybe a lot, to make it out there when I realized that my gas tank was nearly on E--a little close to the actual red line, but I didn't think I had that far to go and I sure didn't want to miss the Suns, heaven forbid. So I figured I'd just get gas on the way home later that night.
After the game, around 930 or so, I was ravishingly hungry and needed some dinner, so we all left in search of some. My dad got in my car to drive, when the gas light dinged at him. Oops, I said, I was gonna get gas on the way out..and now we can just get some on the way to dinner. After a few minutes with him behind the wheel, he started freaking out and saying in a stern voice, "I can't believe you Jenny, you're below the red line!" Now, you have to kinda know my dad. He never ever gets angry, so when he does, you know you did something very bad. That tone came creeping into his voice as he kept going on about how low my gas was, what in the world had I been thinking, and oh gosh you're on vapors. I tried to lighten the mood (as I always do when I'm in a tense situation) and tried to make jokes about how silly this was, how great it would be if we did run out of gas, etc etc. basically, lots of jenny's typical lighthearted stupid comments in an attempt to make everyone happy.
Dad wasn't buying it. He pulled over into the far right lane on oracle and was driving about 35 when the speed should have been about 55. Cars kept zipping by us, and I joked we'd probably just get pulled over for going too slow. we proceeded to keep going slower, and slower, and slower as my dad was promptly lecturing me about how I should never drive alone at night with my gas tank that and how many things could go wrong, and where in the world is the closest gas station. We finally found it, and by this time i was starting to sweat bullets actually wondering if we could possibly run out of gas. My dad turned the car left into the circle k at seriously a snails pace...by this time, Jenny's lighthearted jokes were gone as my dad exclaimed "oh great," in his sturn-dad voice. we had to go up over a small rise into the gas station, and by the time we reached the top of the rise, the car sputtered and stopped. I threw a look of panic at my dad as he exclaimed, "see, I told you Jenny. now you have to get out and push, get out and push!" and I freaked out that (of course) my dad was right and here I am in the wrong and I have to get out an push. I threw open the door and yelled (without thinking) "how do I push?" i turned around with this deer in the headlights look just to see my dad with this hugely sinister grin on his face.
He started laughing hysterically and barely got out that he was kidding about the whole thing. He was so proud at himself for fooling me soooo greatly that I heard about it the entire weekend. I must admit, it was pretty good, and he fooled me so well I bought it hook line and sinker. Although, if anyone again knows me, it's not that hard.
Still really funny though. Gotta love dads. and I sure love mine. :)

Aedh Wishes For The Cloths Of Heaven
~ William Butler Yeats.

Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

another loverly day.......

Well, for a day that didn't start out so well (aka, the worst sleep ever interrupted by a horrific dream where I accidentaly killed my relatives in a desert while I was being chased by crazy army men...dont ask, I must've eaten something very strange to illicit that type of dream), it sure turned into another wonderful day. I woke up early with the sun, made my coffee, and jetted off to the park to estudiar and spend some tiempo with the Lord. It was so peaceful and nice out that I just had a good time talking with God---allowing Him to refocus my heart on Him all over again. God knows I needed that, and I believe that He brought me there just for that reason. I think that sometimes, I just get things better when I'm outside. Not that there's anything magical about it, but when I'm out of my little school-driven life and out staring at the ginormous mountains in front of me, my vision just shifts to what's most important to me....and that is knowing my Lord.
The rest of the day was alright I suppose---work was crazy as always, but gosh I do love those kids. I've only got 3 more days left. Gosh I'm gonna miss them. some of them are starting to grow on me. maybe I can just take one home for fun and keep her for a while, then give her back. they're more fun that way.
the next best thing of the day was Salsa Night on campus....the glories of the salsa club. The nearly 8-piece live band was amazing. I love any music live, but boy (gee golley) that was sure fun. Watching everyone dance just brought back so many memories of my time in Costa Rica, my family there, the people....just everything. I miss it so. I miss the culture. I miss the rhythm of everything. And yes, for a white girl, I don't have much, but it was fun to get my spin on on the dance floor. Next year, I'm gonna rule that place, just wait and see ;)
anyway, it was just a great day. Praise the Lord that He has given me great friends to enjoy these times with....maybe sometime in heaven we can have a salsa club night. maybe God won't object ;)
P.S. Go Aubree----you're my hero.

Fantabulous day...

So, pretty much one of the most enjoyable afternoons in a while--and if only because I was doing what I do best---be a bum in the park. I don't know what it is that draws me so, really it's just being outside, and today was definitely gorgeous. SO, we all went, sat, banged on the djembe and guitar like a bunch of hippies, rode the swings, tossed the frisbee, ate the eegees, and I'll just stop there. basically, it was amazing. it felt like summer is finally upon us (minus the scorching temperatures). I felt like the pressure's off, life is good, until finals hit. aw well. one day at a time. Thank God for days like this :)
P.S. oh, minus the very sad event of a stray dog hanging out with us for a while, if only to leave and chase down a baby bird that fell out of a tree...and proceed to hop around it and playfully bite at it for at least 10 minutes and at least had it in his mouth for a bit of that....i'm not sure if that bird was having the great day that i was.